Saturday, July 26, 2014

Mummy Dearest...

I do not like it when it gets dark,
It reminds me of that unfateful night
And that call I received from Daddy at about 3am...
I used to think about it when I heard news or saw movies of such.
Now that it is really happening to me,
It feels so odd, so raw...
It shocks us all still - so sudden, so unexpected...
I did not even get to see you
There are so many things I wanted to share with you,
So many I have yet to do with you and for you,
Places you wanted to go "When I get better," you would say.
We all looked forward and clung to that hope all these whiles...
Gone too soon...
I wish I could hold you,
Supposed to spend this time off with you
But now I am here... mourning.
Always so selfless, and putting us and our needs before yourself,
You hid your agony and sufferings from us kids...
I beat myself up for not being medically-knowledgeable or educated enough to see the signs.
Such strong will, you fought till the very end, never giving up.
Was it the doctor's mistake and negligence? Treatment gone wrong? Or wrong timing?
I am sorry I was not even there for you and with you...
But what is the use of putting blames now?
It changes nothing. It cannot bring back my Mummy...
Over the years, you have cried for me and with me; laughed with me; worried for me; gotten angry or disappointed in me, but you never stopped believing in me; prayed unceasingly for me;
And most importantly, you have taught me how to love, and to pray and know God.
Your love and legacy shine through and shall live on forever...
It comforts me though, to know that you are in a better place now
Home where it is filled with much beauty, peace, love and joy.
At least it ends and takes away your pain and sufferings...
Now that you are with the Lord,
I shall be strong and good and do my part to the greater Glory of the Lord, as you had
So that I may be reunited with you again
And all the faithful ones
When my time on Earth has come.
I love you and I miss you dearly, Mummy...

Love,
Your Daughter

4 comments:

Ling @ Lim said...

Hi Sylvia, this is truly a very touching tribute to your mum. I am sure your mum would be comforted by this blog article of yours. She may be gone but she is definitely in a better place now and her suffering has ended.

A lot of people (including me) are of the opinion that your mum and dad are one of the most loving couples they have ever come across. This speaks volume of the love that binds them throughtout their married life.

I was at the requiem mass for your mum at St. Joseph's Cathedral and it was truly heartbreaking to see your dad breaking down and sobbing uncontrollably towards the end of the mass. Your dad's grief was unmeasurable and I know how hard it must have been for him to try to accept the passing away of your mum. He must be feeling that there is a big vacuum in his life now that your mum is gone. Do your best to comfort him.

I can only pray that you, your dad and your brother Gabriel will be strong and that God will comfort you all. Take care and God Bless!

Unknown said...

Hello there. Thank you.
Yes, I always thought I am blessed to be able to grow up with two most loving parents who have shown me what true God's love really is. My parents had been so close and to see my Dad breaking down that way truly broke my heart. He has always been the optimistic man I grew up to know. I understand how everything reminds him of my mother. A lot of things remind me of her...Can almost hear her nagging for us to take good care of ourselves. We miss her very very much.
Thank you for your prayers. God bless you, too.

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