They let out, almost a shriek, attracting attention from around us, their eyes wide opened, their jaws drop.
Such are the reactions I get from new people I meet when I tell them that I am married.
Their responses usually, "You're married?! I thought you have just graduated!"
And I would feel my heart let out a faint yelp at the statement. *I wish! Well, I ought to be.*
Adding that I have got two kids, and their jaws drop further. When they question my kids' age, and when they learn that my youngest is an infant below 1 year of age, I get the head-to-toe stare.
"You don't look like you're married and certainly not like you have already given birth to two kids! You look like you're single." or "You look so young! How old are you??"
I wonder if I should be telling this with glee. Perhaps, for the part where I do not look like I have given birth and that I look young, I guess I am flattered(?) - although I certainly have not felt so young, since... I do not even remember when.
However, I find it absurd that most people are still taken aback by the fact that I am married. I mean, how can you tell whether someone should be already married or not - whatever that means. I have some friends my age who are married, too. Few younger, even. Why? Do I look like I do not deserve to marry? Or do I really look like a kid who is way too young to be married? - which are both not good reasons at all - although I think they may mean well when they pose those questions.
I know many are trying so hard to maintain or regain their youth. Honestly, the thought of premature aging damages does frighten me. Regardless, the fact that we are living in a society where most people are too busy to stop and pay attention to minors, is not an advantage to me if the statements about my youthful appearance stand true. It means I certainly have to work a whole lot harder to prove myself, especially in the career world. I admit there are occasions I get such ignorance and vibes, as if these 'important people' are thinking, "She is just a child. Ngeh! What does she know?"
Well, I really should not bother about such things. We cannot control other people's thoughts and judgement afterall. If they want to be judgemental, let them be. I do not need to answer to people in the end. If it means I need to work extra hard in my career, so be it. Everyone has got his/her story behind those 'masks' we see on the surface. So, I have learnt to not judge.
Besides, I really should try to learn and cherish my youth. It is a gift. The world has just gotten too engrossed in their pursuit of material things and wealth. Even kids these days have forgotten and are no longer introduced to our imaginary games and fun in the olden days. Tsk. Let children be children! I heard somewhere before that children are born smart. It is what the adults input into their minds as they are growing which makes them become 'stupid'.
Why is it that as children, we saw the world as the beautiful Earth with all the life in it that God has created for us, which we could not wait to explore and we saw so many potentials to grow in and change for a better future (and we could not wait to grow up), but as we grow up, and as adult, we see the world as the harsh and cruel reality? - wars and injustice; pride and prejudice; materialistic wealth and power...
Funny, because I thought we all, children or adult, live on the same planet, breathe the same air, witness the same sunrise and sunsets, and view the same moon and stars at night. It is not the world which has changed, but the people and their man-made laws.
Oh, I miss crawling under the tables and playing pretend camping with friends when in primary school; the fake birthday cake I made and brought to school for the fake birthday party we celebrated during break time (and I remember one of the teachers stood by and watched us outside the classroom window, smiling to himself); the playing pretend we were mermaids when swimming on weekends with cousins; and I guess if I were to come up with the list of things we did as kids, my post will take a whole page! Those were the days.
Why can't we think and see the world like children?
And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them and said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. “Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me, but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea.
(Matthew 18:2-6)
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